Tag Archives: Terry Gordy

Fire Pro Wrestling Returns: The Briefcase Cup – GRAND FINAL!

IntroductionMatch 1Match 2Match 3Match 4 Match 5
Match 6Match 7Match 8Match 9Match 10 – Match 11
Match 12 – Match 13 – Match 14 – Match 15 – Match 16
Match 17 – Match 18 – Match 19 – Match 20 – Match 21
Match 22 – Match 23 – Match 24 – Quarterfinal 1 – Quarterfinal 2
Semifinals

TONIGHT – It all comes to a head. From a field of 32 brazen wrasslin’ ripoffs, we’ve whittled away all but two. Who is the fiercest fraud? The most sensational stand-in? THE DEADLIEST DOPPELGANGER? We’re going to answer these questions the only way we know how: by putting two goliaths in a wrestling ring, surrounding it with barbed wire and explosives, and letting nature take its course! Borgart. Boggy. It’s the GRAND FINAL of the Briefcase Cup!

GRAND FINAL: GIGANT BORGART v. KERRY BOGGY!

GIGANT BORGART

  • Nickname: The Mad Express
  • FPWR Profile: “Tramples rivals like a runaway train.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’3″/331 lbs.
  • A/K/A: Giant Bernard, Prince Albert, Albert, A-Train, Tensai
  • Victims: Mascara Eagle 2Giant Rozhmov, Blood Love, Steel James

As we discussed back in Match 2, professional wrestler Matt Bloom has mangled his opponents under many different monikers. He began his career in the WWE as “Prince Albert,” the bodyguard and “personal piercer” of Darren Drozdov. Later, that was shortened to just “Albert,” and “Albert” gave-way to “A-Train.” Most recently, he bulldozed his way through the WWE as Lord Tensai.

Briefcase Cup Match 17 - Giant Rozhmov v. Gigant  Borgart Screenshot 2015-04-07 20-23-17

All of these personas, though, pale in comparison to Bloom’s run as Giant Bernard. As Giant Bernard, Bloom cast a menacing shadow over Japanese wrestling. He captured the New Japan Cup in 2006. He challenged for the All Japan Triple Crown Championship and the IWGP Heavyweight Championship. That’s just the very tip of the iceberg, folks – he collected no small number of tag belts and other accolades. In the Briefcase Cup, Bernard’s stand-in, Gigant Borgart, has been no frills and all kills, demolishing FPWR‘s versions of Alberto Del Rio, André the Giant, Bret Hart, and Steve Williams. He’s ruthlessly cut down giants, technicians, and luchadors alike. The pain train does not discriminate!

tensai

So, while you may think Borgart has exceeded expectations, you’d be dead wrong: he was a smart bet right from the jump. We cannot state firmly enough that this man was, and is, BIG IN JAPAN. The “Mad Express” finally pulls into the station tonight. Will it depart with the Briefcase Cup (not to mention the trip to space camp and Applebee’s gift card that comes with it)?

KERRY BOGGY

  • Nickname: Dr. Nuke
  • FPWR Profile: “His deadly power is atomic.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’4″/298 lbs.
  • A/K/A: Terry Gordy
  • Victims: Kerry TexanCrazy Rose, Sumo, Great Shiba

GordyCroppedNo matter how this shakes out, we here at Subspace Briefcase will be eternally grateful to Kerry Boggy for removing the scourge of Giant Shiba/The Great Khali from the Briefcase Cup. There were a few brief seconds there where we thought the “Punjabi Playboy” might win this whole thing. Without being too smarky, let’s just say that would have jeopardized our street cred.

Briefcase Cup Semifinal 2 - Great Shiba v. Kerry Boggy Screenshot 2015-04-07 20-26-52

Kerry Boggy is FPWR‘s Terry Gordy, who we first met back in Match 16. Starting his career at age 14, Terry rose to prominence as a member The Fabulous Freebirds, one of the greatest tag teams of the 80’s, if not all time. Terry would later take his talents to All Japan Pro Wrestling, where he became a seven-time tag team champion and captured the Triple Crown Championship. In All Japan, Gordy became one of the most revered and decorated gaijins to set foot in a Japanese ring. At one time, he was, perhaps, one of the BIGGEST IN JAPAN.

MiracleViolenceConnection2

Gordy formed one half of The Miracle Violence Connection with “Doctor Death” Steve Williams. As the name implies, they were a force to be reckoned with, winning the World’s Strongest Tag Determination League twice. In defeating Steel James, Borgart robbed the duo of a guaranteed win. That just can’t sit well with our favorite Freebird.

Tragically, Terry passed away in 2001. But his memory lives on in the Briefcase Cup! As we’ve stated before, Terry Gordy (and by association, Kerry Boggy), was a real American shitkicker. This man entered the ring to Lynyrd Skinner and Kiss. He found it funny when people shot at him. He cut promos about belching and stomping. He LOVED HIS VAN! They just don’t make ’em like this anymore folks, and that’s a DAMN shame.

THIS. WILL. BE. A. SLOBBERKNOCKER.


FINAL GRAPPLING GO!

Truly a final befitting these brutal behemoths! With the fatigue of four rounds of combat setting in, Borgart and Boggy battled for only seven minutes – but not a second came easy. Boggy put up an effort worthy of his real world counterpart, but a series of Argentine leglocks took his wheels out from underneath him. From there, Borgart nailed Boggy with his own finisher – the Wild Bomb – three times! A Neck Hanging Bomb sealed Boggy’s fate at 6:57. And even then he kicked out a millisecond later!

GIGANT BORGART IS NOW OFFICIALLY THE GREATEST KNOCKOFF WRESTLER OF ALL TIME! SUCK IT, KIN CORN KARN!

Briefcase Cup - Raw Footage Screenshot 2015-04-07 17-36-16And thus concludes our epic ring opera. We hope you enjoyed reading this as much as we enjoyed writing it. If nothing else, we had a few laughs, and learned about some legendary pro wrestlers in the process.

Let us know what you thought! Find us on Twitter at @subspacebc! Shoot us a line on Facebook! All criticisms, comments, and complaints are welcome. It’d be nice to know that we didn’t sacrifice our sanity to Papaya Tokuma for nothing!

For now, there’s no next time… BUT THE BRIEFCASE CUP WILL RETURN!

Fire Pro Wrestling Returns: The Briefcase Cup – Semifinals!

IntroductionMatch 1Match 2Match 3Match 4 Match 5
Match 6Match 7Match 8Match 9Match 10 – Match 11
Match 12 – Match 13 – Match 14 – Match 15 – Match 16
Match 17 – Match 18 – Match 19 – Match 20 – Match 21
Match 22 – Match 23 – Match 24 – Quarterfinal 1 – Quarterfinal 2

Four will enter, but only TWO will leave! We’ve got a semifinal spectucular of sensational scope for you tonight, as the best of the best, the CREAM OF THE CROP, square off for a shot at glory! TONIGHT!

SEMIFINAL 1: GIGANT BORGART v. STEEL JAMES

GIGANT BORGART

  • Nickname: The Mad Express
  • FPWR Profile: “Tramples rivals like a runaway train.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’3″/331 lbs.
  • A/K/A: Giant Bernard, Prince Albert, Albert, A-Train, Tensai
  • Victims: Mascara Eagle 2Giant Rozhmov, Blood Love

When you’ve racked up five distinct pseudonyms, you’re either a failed poet or a legitimate threat to humanity. We’ll let you guess which of those things Gigant Borgart is, but let’s just say that the man writes one hell of a haiku. A lot of fearsome opponents have found themselves smeared on the tracks of the “Mad Express:” Blood. Giant. Mascara. Well, maybe that last one isn’t so menacing. But whatever. This freight train appears to be heading towards the finals. Who dares to stand in its way?

STEEL JAMES

  • Nickname: Dr. Cruelty
  • FPWR Profile: “He’s the most feared rival in the States.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’2″/271 lbs.
  • A/K/A: “Dr. Death” Steve Williams
  • Victims: Andy SpiralsDeucy James, Dynamic Kid

Tonight, Dr. Cruelty may just get a taste of his own medicine. He’s been administering lethal injections of pain to cruiserweights – he outweighed his heaviest opponent by nearly 40 pounds. Borgart outweighs James by about 60 pounds. Tonight, for the first time, Steel will test his mettle against a larger opponent.

Just because he’s outweighed, though, doesn’t mean he’s outgunned. They don’t call his finish the Murder Backdrop for nothing. Folks, one thing’s for sure: this will not be pretty.


LET’S SEMIFINALS!

Let it be known: barbed wire landmines only make Borgart angrier. Perhaps looking to neutralize his opponent’s weight advantage, James went to the barbed wire early. Unfortunately for him, this only seemed to rouse our slumbering Gigant, who bent Steel to his will at 9:18 with his signature Neck Hanging Bomb.


 SEMIFINAL 2: GREAT SHIBA v. KERRY BOGGY

GREAT SHIBA

  • Nickname: Super Giant
  • FPWR Profile: “The giant from India suddenly emerged.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 7’2/441 lbs.
  • A/K/A: The Great Khali
  • Victims: G.O. BrightKAZUYA, Big G. Bull

I don’t know if there’s anything more to say about Great Shiba. Despite his limited wrestling prowess, he’s performed admirably well, taking out three legends, including faux Bruiser Brody. The man is, quite simply, exceptionally large. Nobody in this tournament can afford to take Shiba lightly.

I mean, just look at the man.

khaliaxe

Really, take a nice long gander. If FPWR‘s statistics are accurate, that axe has gotta be north of 7’6″. So just remember, when you’re in the ring with this guy, you’re in the ring with a man that can swing an axe taller than the overwhelming majority of the Earth’s population. Shiba is a legitimate danger – but you know what the crazy thing is? His opponent JUST. DOES. NOT. CARE.

KERRY BOGGY

  • Nickname: Dr. Nuke
  • FPWR Profile: “His deadly power is atomic.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’4″/298 lbs.
  • A/K/A: Terry Gordy
  • Victims: Kerry TexanCrazy Rose, Sumo

Hey, do you see that? Enhance.

Gordyphase2

No. The right eye. Enhance,

Gordyphase3

Closer! Closer, damn you! ENHANCE!

Gordyphase5

CONFOUND IT MAN! RIGHT IN THE PUPIL. ENHANCE RIGHT INTO KERRY BOGGY’S SOUL!

Gordyphase7

Whoa.

gordyphase7WHOA…. AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…

gordyphase8

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH…..! Huh?

gordyvan

No… words… should have sent… a… poet. Our savior has arrived. At the heart of Kerry Boggy’s soul lies the ultimate symbol of American cultural superiority – a completely badass airbrushed van. So pure, so simple… so… I’m sorry, I can’t type any more, the tears are making it tough to see.

At the core of it all… there’s just a sweet ass van. And Great Shiba WILL-NOT-TOUCH-THAT-VAN. USA! USA! USA!

Animated American Flag


LET’S SEMIFINALS!

Lady and gentleman, I am not a patriotic person, but I submit to you that there is nothing more American than Kerry Boggy/Terry Gordy. I have never been prouder to be an American and a former van owner than right now.

But something tells me that Borgart just won’t care. And you know what, Boggy will probably like it that way. Which is why you should come back next time for the THRILLING CONCLUSION! Our long odyssey draws to a close in the FINALS! – NEXT!

Fire Pro Wrestling Returns: The Briefcase Cup – Quarterfinals 2

IntroductionMatch 1Match 2Match 3Match 4 Match 5
Match 6Match 7Match 8Match 9Match 10 – Match 11
Match 12 – Match 13 – Match 14 – Match 15 – Match 16
Match 17 – Match 18 – Match 19 – Match 20 – Match 21
Match 22 – Match 23 – Match 24 – Quarterfinal 1

TONIGHT – The herd is thinning, but that doesn’t mean the rage has diminished! It’s quarerfinal CHAOS as we serve up another two-pack of TERROR!

QUARTERFINAL 3: BIG G. BULL v. GREAT SHIBA

BIG G. BULL

  • Nickname: The Brain
  • FPWR Profile: “The stern monster with beastly skills.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’5″/298 lbs.
  • A/K/A: Bruiser Brody
  • Victims: Keiji TogashiStar Bison

If he wasn’t a legend in his own right, we’d call Big G. Bull, FPWR‘s surrogate for Bruiser Brody, a legend killer. His victims include fake Kenta Kobashi, one of the greatest Japanese wrestlers of all time, and quasi Stan Hansen, who may have been the first person to slam André the Giant (sorry – we mean Giant Rozhmov). While “The Brain” has no intention of losing tonight, he’ll need to rely on more than his mental acumen if he wants to take down…

GREAT SHIBA

  • Nickname: Super Giant
  • FPWR Profile: “The giant from India suddenly emerged.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 7’2/441 lbs.
  • A/K/A: The Great Khali
  • Victims: G.O. BrightKAZUYA

Let no one say that size does not matter. How else could a man that can barely pull off a powerbomb get this far? While Great Shiba, the FPWR friendly version of the Great Khali, has never been known for his wrestling acumen, he has performed quite admirably thus far. He’s defeated stand-in for legendary shooter, Gary Albright! He stood stalwart against the ferocious fury of KAZUYA, an approximation of rising WWE star Hideo Itami! He’s an immovable object in search of an irresistible force! Will Big G. Bull be the man to subjugate the “Super Giant?”


 QUARTERFINALING GO!

Forget a bolt gun, it looks like barbed wire landmines are the best way to take down a bull. With two”Final Powerbombs,” Big G. Bull gives up the ghost at 12:16. Perhaps he can take small comfort in the fact that he made a misnomer out of Shiba’s finishing maneuver.


 QUARTERFINAL 4: SUMO v. KERRY BOGGY

SUMO

rikishibelt

  • Nickname: Giant Hip
  • FPWR Profile: “This Sumo wrestler smashes anything.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’0″/286 lbs.
  • A/K/A: Rikishi, The Sultan, Fatu, Junior Fatu
  • Victims: TattooPapaya Tokuma

Rikishi (2)Rikishi, the wrestler simulated by Sumo, rose to prominence by crushing opponents with his giant “hips” and throwing his weight around. So why is Sumo billed at a mere 286 pounds? We can only assume that this is an error… or perhaps… perhaps he’s an impostor among impostors? Conventional wisdom tells us that muscle is denser than fat… and Sumo is manifestly fat. How could a man carrying around nothing but excess body weight defeat the FPWR version of Sabu and the logical nightmare that is Papaya Tokuma? Something tells me that…

KERRY BOGGY

gordybelt

  • Nickname: Dr. Nuke
  • FPWR Profile: “His deadly power is atomic.”
  • Billed Height/Weight: 6’4″/298 lbs.
  • A/K/A: Terry Gordy
  • Victims: Kerry TexanCrazy Rose

Terry GordyDr. Nuke will get to the bottom of this. Kerry Boggy, nuclear physicist and clone of van enthusiast, Terry Gordy, has been on a tear. He savagely slaughtered pseudo Terry Funk! He wantonly wasted sort of Scott Hall! The man that belches the loudest cares not about your age, weight, or size. He will put this boot right here upside your head! Let’s find out if there’s any blood left in Sumo’s body, right here on Bad Street!


QUARTERFINALING GO!

Let this be a lesson to all of us – lying about your weight gets you nowhere. Kerry Boggy advances to the semis with a vicious lariat at 10:44!

NEXT TIME: The semifinals!

Fire Pro Wrestling Returns: The Briefcase Cup – Match 24

MATCH 24 – “THE PLAYBOY” CRAZY ROSE v. “DR. NUKE” KERRY BOGGY

IntroductionMatch 1Match 2Match 3Match 4 Match 5
Match 6Match 7Match 8Match 9Match 10 – Match 11
Match 12 – Match 13 – Match 14 – Match 15 – Match 16
Match 17 – Match 18 – Match 19 – Match 20 – Match 21 – Match 22  Match 23

Round 2 comes to its thorny conclusion TONIGHT, as Crazy Rose takes on our favorite nuclear physicist, “Dr. Nuke” Kerry Boggy! It’s our last bio segment, AND WE DO NOT INTENDED TO DISAPPOINT.

VIOLENCE GET! YOU LOST YOUR MIND, CHICO!

CRAZY ROSE

Briefcase Cup Match 15 - Crazy Rose v. The Spike Screenshot 2015-03-30 19-40-12

ScottHall2We last saw Scott Hall lookalike, Crazy Rose, back in Match 15. There, he tangled with the man called Spike, winning with his signature fallaway slam at the 11:16 mark. While Rose’s victory was undeniably impressive, his opponent tonight is going to be in far better condition, having finished his first match in a mere 3:35! If Rose is going to emerge victorious tonight, he’s going to have to rely on his… intangibles.

During his time as an active competitor, Hall was a master of psychological warfare. And by psychological warfare, I mean throwing toothpicks.

The fact that they never see it coming (he nailed Lex Luger at least three separate times in that video!) shows that Hall, and, by the Fire Pro transitive corollary, Rose, have a keen grasp on what it takes to get in their opponents’ heads and control a match. If Rose can use his intellect to dictate the pace of the bout early, he might have a chance of surviving here.

Hall was also well known for keeping his composure under pressure. Just watch:

That soda hit him clean in the head and HE DIDN’T EVEN FLINCH. A lesser man would have flipped his wig. Hall clearly has nerves of steel and invulnerable hair. He may have had a rough trip through the first round, but he certainly won’t be going in scared. That’s a definite plus when you are up against…

KERRY BOGGY

Briefcase Cup Match 16 - Kerry Texan v. Kerry Boggy Screenshot 2015-03-30 19-41-56

terrygordy3Kerry Boggy, FPWR’s answer to Terry Gordy, holds the Briefcase Cup record for fastest victory. Back in Match 16, he leveled Kerry Texan with a brutal powerbomb in just 3:35! We know he’s the fresher man, and we know he hits like a ton of bricks – but how does he match up against Crazy Rose in the… intangibles department?

Well, he’s the biggest man and the man who belches and stomps the loudest. He also hates stooges with a passion. Hey, don’t take my word for it:

Also, if you touch his van, he’ll kill you.

All of these seem like very good assets to bring into a fight with a master ring psychologist like Crazy Rose.


LET’S WRESTLING!

We don’t have any proof of this, but an anonymous source has advised us that Crazy Rose did, in fact, attempt to touch someone’s van prior to this match. If said van belonged to Boggy,this might explain how he was able to withstand every single move in Rose’s arsenal to pick up a victory via lariat at 10:26. Somehow, this feels like a victory for America.

Next time: THE QUARTER FINALS!

Fire Pro Wrestling Returns: The Briefcase Cup – Match 16

MATCH 16: “THE WILD BRONCO” KERRY TEXAN v. “DR. NUKE” KERRY BOGGY

IntroductionMatch 1Match 2Match 3Match 4 Match 5
Match 6Match 7Match 8Match 9Match 10 – Match 11
Match 12 – Match 13 – Match 14 – Match 15

We’ve reached the end of the opening round! Dr. Nuke attempts to give the Wild Bronco a lesson in atomic theory as Kerry Boggy takes on Kerry Texan! THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE… guy named Kerry in this tournament. TONIGHT!

KERRY TEXAN

Terry Funk

terry funk2We’ve already featured one member of the Texan clan (may that be the last time I ever type the phrase “Texan clan”). You may recall, fan, that we featured the talents of Harry Texan, Jr. – a stand in for the legendary Dory Funk, Jr. – a few weeks back. Kerry Texan is a stand in for Dory’s younger brother, Terry Funk. Aesthetically, FPWR has nailed it. Kerry’s got Terry’s long thinning hair, and he’s wearing a reasonable approximation of Terry’s signature striped tights and headband.

The finishing maneuver, though? Not so much. Kerry’s finishing maneuver is a “Texas Jab.” Terry more commonly employed a spinning toe hold (like his brother) or a piledriver as his finishing maneuver. That being said, it was not uncommon for Terry to paste his opponents with a multi-punch combo during his matches, and I assume that’s what FPWR is referencing. Just fast forward to 6:38 in the video below.

Kerry is known as the “Wild Bronco,” which is approrpiate, because Japanese audiences referred to his real life counterpart as the “Texas Bronco.” Don’t believe me? Just google translate this page and search for it. It clearly says “And ‘Kamen noble’ Mil Máscaras stomping set is two people living legend of ‘Texas Bronco’ Terry Funk.” I rest my case.

If you read further in that article, you’ll also note that “Terry received the touch down swinging the chair from throwing the audience when take out to curb the out of the question to brains.” Terry Funk has done a lot of things that are “out of the question to brains,” which might explain why FPWR has dubbed Kerry Texan both a “legendary man” and a “reckless dad.”

You see, Terry Funk would have been BIG IN JAPAN had he stopped wrestling in 1993, at the ripe middle age of 49. By that time, he’d already won All Japan Pro Wrestling‘s World’s Strongest Tag Determination League three times with his brother, Dory, and he’d won more titles than you can shake a stick at. Hell, he’d even landed a role in Road House. He didn’t win an Oscar, but he deserves some kind of statue for his performance. I’m not sure how Swayze ever recovered from that zinger.

But Terry Funk didn’t stop. He joined the International Wrestling Association of Japan, an independent Japanese promotion, and started playing with fire. No, you don’t understand; he really started playing with fire:

The original incarnation of IWA Japan, which existed from 1994-1996, was primarily focused on deathmatch wrestling. That’s a lot like hardcore wrestling, but with a much higher chance of the participants actually killing one another. So, Terry, being one of the most respected (and technically sound) wrestlers of all time, and a father of two, logically decided it was the best place for him to ply his trade. “Reckless dad?” Arguable. “Out of the question to brains?” Definitely.

But that clip doesn’t even begin to do Terry’s foray into deathmatch wrestling. Here he is facing off against Mick Foley in an exploding ring barbed wire match:

He also took on Japanese deathmatch legend Atsushi Onita on more than a few occasions. Note how the ring explodes at about the 21:15 mark:

Please note that Mr. Onita went on to become an elected representative in Japan, so should you meet him, please address him with appropriate honorifics.

Terry even went on to bring deathmatch wrestling to ECW, where he took on Tattoo – er, sorry – Sabu in one of the first barbed wire matches to reach American audiences. The commercials they ran for this match still give me nightmares.

Terry Funk is still out there doing this. He’s 70. He was BIG IN JAPAN, and he’s in his element in the Briefcase Cup’s deathmatch setting.

But who am I kidding, what he’s most remembered for is his music career.

KERRY BOGGY

Terry Gordy

terry gordyIf we assume that “Kerry” is FPWR’s ever-so-subtle shorthand for “Terry,” we’re already halfway to the conclusion that “Kerry Boggy” is the late Terry Gordy. Terry was known to known to American audiences as “Bam Bam,” and to Japanese audiences as “The Human Torpedo.” Both nicknames have an explosive component to them, which is why I believe FPWR settled on “Dr. Nuke.” Kerry utilizes a “Wild Bomb” as his finishing maneuver. A “Wild Bomb” is a powerbomb into a pinning combination, which Terry employed to great success throughout his career:

Fabulous_FreebirdsTerry started wrestling at the age of 14. He earned his first taste of fame as the muscle for The Fabulous Freebirds, one of the greatest tag teams of the 80’s. Yes, they were a tag team comprised of three dudes. People just went with it. Perhaps most remembered for their time in World Class Championship Wrestling, Terry and his partners have often been called the greatest tag team of all time, winning just about every tag team title possible outside of the WWF.

In the late 80’s early 90’s, Terry took his talents to All Japan Pro Wrestling, where he became BIG IN JAPAN. We’re talking Godzilla huge. Like his opponent, Terry also won the World’s Strongest Tag Determination League three times – once with Star Bison/Stan Hansen, and twice with Steel James/Steve Williams. Together, Williams and Gordy were known as the “Miracle Violence Connection,” which is probably the best name for anything to ever come out of Japan.

Gordy would capture tag team gold 7 times in AJPW. Terry won’t have his partners to back him up in this tournament, but that shouldn’t be a problem for the ol’ Human Torpedo. He had a successful Japanese singles career as well, which perhaps reached its zenith when he captured the Triple Crown Championship in 1990.

Yep, that’s Stan Hansen he beat there. Gordy was BIG IN JAPAN without question. Terry Gordy looked like – and was – a real American shitkicker. I mean that in the best possible sense. He gave his opponents the old fashioned kind of beating up; the kind where he beat on them a lot more than they beat on him. Sadly, Terry passed away in 2001. If this loving tribute is any indication, though, it wasn’t before he became one of America’s greatest ambassadors of pre-scripted pain.

In any event, this should be a brutal match – two of the biggest American names in Japanese wrestling. My money is on Kerry.


 LET’S WRESTLING!

GREAT GOOGLEDY MOOGLEDY. Dr. Nuke busts the Wild Bronco at 3:35 with a shocking KO! You don’t need a degree in nuclear physics to know that we’ve got a new Briefcase Cup record!

We’ve done it! We’ve profiled all the wrestlers in the Briefcase Cup! It only took three months and my reputation as a sane person! But don’t put your foam fingers away just yet – we’ve got more brutal action coming your way in ROUND 2!