MATCH 8: “MAD BOMBER” DYNAMIC KID v. “HOT SPICE” CURRY MASK
Let’s not forget what the Briefcase Cup is all about: showcasing blatant knockoffs of the wrestlers who sacrifice their health, sanity, and occasionally, their lives in service of our entertainment. While we’re far from the end of the tournament, this evening, we’re presenting two of our strongest entrants from the “Were they Even Trying?” division. Tonight, THE WORLD’S GREATEST RIPOFF may just make his presence known.
You don’t even have to use your imagination; the developers didn’t. Dynamic Kid is the legendary Dynamite Kid, Tom Billington. Just in case you we’re having difficulty getting to “4” from “2+2,” they went ahead and made Dynamic’s nickname “Mad Bomber.” He’s pure Dynamite. Astute legal scholars will also note that Dynamic is just four days younger than Dynamite, thereby granting the developers of FPWR a flawless defense in any copyright infringement lawsuit. “But, your honor – did you see the birthday? CHECK and MATE, Mr. Billington.”
Like Dynamite, Dynamic utilizes a flying headbutt as a finisher. Technically, Dynamic utilizes a “Super Dive Headbutt,” which I can only assume is slightly more awesome. The flying headbutt is a maneuver that has fallen out of vogue in recent years, thanks to its propensity to inflict concussions on its proponents, but damned if Dynamite didn’t make like his opponents were getting the worst of it.
If any western wrestling fan remembers Dynamite, it would likely be for his time as part of the British Bulldogs with Mightyboy Edd….. errr… Davey Boy Smith. During their four year run in the WWF, Dynamite and Davey earned a cult following, capturing the tag team titles at Wrestlemania 2 (while cornered by Ozzy Osbourne, no less).
Despite his “mainstream” success, what Dynamite is most known for today is his time in Japan. If you search for video on Dynamite, you’ll find that he wrestled a gentleman named “Tiger Mask” more than a few times. Here’s a playlist of 12 of those matches:
The “Tiger Mask” that Dynamite wrestled was a legendary Japanese wrestler by the name of Satoru Sayama. If you’ve been following the Briefcase Cup diligently, you may remember him from our entry on Blood Love. Dynamite’s matches with Tiger Mask are often credited with putting the junior/cruiserweight style of wrestling on the map. This might explain why Dynamic’s profile states that he “overwhelms opponents with his small body.” It’s not the size of the charge, but the yield of the blast, huh?
Anyway, the overwhelming majority of these matches took place under the banner of New Japan Pro Wrestling. Dynamite was BIG IN JAPAN, an unqualified legend. He should do well in this tournament.
And just in case you didn’t feel like watching all 12 matches in the playlist above, here’s a highlight video:
Well hot damn. Whoever takes on our boy Dynamic had better be a serious badasss.
This guy looks the part, right? As the picture to the left demonstrates, Curry Mask is clearly supposed to be Curry Man. If Curry man isn’t a badass, at bare minimum, his spicy flavor will sure leave your ass feeling bad (shut up, that’s the best I could think of after 5 minutes). Curry Mask is virtually identical to Curry Man. He even has the exact same finisher, the Spicy Drop:
This is blatant thievery. I can only assume that the developers hedged their bets here – it’s well-known that Curry Man is the alter-ego of independent wrestling phenomenon, Christopher Daniels, but would he be willing to testify to that in court? Well-played, FPWR. You called his bluff. Enjoy your ill-gotten yen from the infinity pool atop your secret Mt. Fuji headquarters, you bastards.
Where to even start with Curry Man? Well, I guess we’ll go with spectacular tribute video:
While Daniels was a known commodity in the states when FPWR was being developed, Curry Man had made few, if any, American appearances. In Japan, however, it appears that the shoe was on the other foot: Curry Man was really turning up the heat. Here he is beating a dude in a tiger mask. It’s not THE Tiger Mask, but hey, it’s gotta count for something, right? They can’t be giving those things out for free.
Curry Man wasn’t a superstar on Dynamite Kid’s level – he isn’t credited with inventing an entire style of wrestling – but that’s not to say he hadn’t racked up his fair share of accolades! He captured the British Commonwealth Junior Heavyweight Championship (one of the strangest titles in all of wrestling) during a stint in Michinoku Pro Wrestling, and was part of several successful tag teams. While teaming with a gentleman by the name of “Super Rice Boy,” he even managed to defeat the team of the Great Sasuke and Taka Michinoku in the finals of the 2002 Futaritabi Tag Team League! I know, right? Seriously though, that’s a tremendous accomplishment.
Was he BIG IN JAPAN? Yes, but not on the level of Dynamite. Perhaps, more importantly, though, he was HOT IN JAPAN. Curry Man was so hot they were afraid to serve him to American audiences. Will that be enough for Curry Mask to defuse the Mad Bomber?
GOOO! Talk about your five-star matches. Despite a slow start, Curry took advantage of the no-rules stipulation and turned the tide with several kicks to Dynamic’s cherry bombs. Curry even broke out the all time greatest wrestling taunt of all time – pointing to your head to show how smart you are – TWICE! But true to his bio, Dynamic simply overwhelmed him with his small body. I have to wonder if the fix was in; this might have worked out quite differently if Curry could have scaled the turnbuckles.